naomiland

home sweet home

nothing beats coming home from a vacation only to find that your life has decided to get all fucked up. gotta love it!

i'm so happy that the asshole who rear-ended my rental car on the way to UC Irvine a few months back is kindly refusing to pay for the damages. the uninsured, at-fault asshole, i might add. so now i get to decide if it's worth it to pursue him through my insurance company...of course i opted NOT to get the rental insurance through enterprise that would have enabled me to walk away from this incident without a second thought...because NOTHING ever happens in a rental car, right? it's all a scam to get you to pay an extra $20/day, right? ya...

and then i overdrew my account by like $1.39 or something while waiting for a check to clear...so then there was an overdraft fee charged...and then somehow that caused another one....which caused another one...how do these things happen?!? the bank should not be allowed to charge overdraft fees on overdraft fees. that just feels wrong.

all bitching aside, i had a wonderful time away and look forward to the next. and the next after that. and so on.

oh wait - was i supposed to say it's great to be back?

the only thing more painful...

i discovered the only thing more painful than a bikini wax this afternoon while lying on the table...a bikini wax while being forced to listen to sarah brightman.

man, that shit is AWFUL!!! it made me miss the pan flute new-age crap they usually torture me with.

and again...

just in case you were interested in draping another animal's skin and fur over your dog...

so wrong it's scary...

i mean, really - Glamourdog.com's new "puppy purse" in the aptly named "drop dead pink" - just strap your dog in and you can suspend him from your arm while you shop! wtf.

craigslist idiot of the day

$100 - Poet seeking muse

WHO SAYS YOU CAN’T BUY LOVE?

Any young independently wealthy females out there interested in being immortalized? Would you like to be my muse? Would you like to share your trust fund with someone who has no drive whatsoever and who only wants to spend his time padding your ego with sweet, sweet prose?

Our sweet, sweet love like copper pipes,
Holding water in without lead poisoning.
The dripping faucet reminds me of each kiss,
We held close to each others secret wish,
Whenever it was time to say goodbye
I didn’t know how
And I didn’t know why
I could only hold you close
And look to the sky
I can’t even crack a joke
‘Cause I’m so broke
I can’t pay attention
To anything but you
And if I end up getting choked
You can remove my feeding tube.

There’s more where that came from. All you have to do is give me a warm place to stay, and some food. Lemme know if there’s any takers…

oh my it's been a while...

sorry guys...was in the middle of a crazy move. i'm all settled in now, internet is working, shoes are stacked neatly in the closet, extra soap and toilet paper tucked away under the sink. life is good. truly.

i just rehearsed with my band last night - for anyone in the LA area - you don't wanna miss the show this saturday at hotel cafe - it's gonna rock. seriously. i can't believe how much fun it was to play with a big drum kit and bass - and we'll have electric guitar, too...i'm really excited. really really really.

and what else...hmmm...nothing, really. i'll write more later when my brain decides to kick in.

something that bugs me

those awful people who love to take it upon themselves to tell you that "dogs are not allowed" at whichever particular location you happen to be.

they're always whiney. and they say it in passing, like they're afraid to really confront you, but feel the need to assert some little bit of power as they walk by. their little moment of authority in an otherwise meaningless life.

i loathe and pity these people, all at the same time. my first reaction is to fire off some witty put-down, but then the pity kicks in and just feel sorry for them. poor, useless people whose one bit of power comes from telling some girl with a 2 lb dog sleeping quietly on her shoulder that "dogs are not allowed."

never mind the fact that my dog is probably much cleaner and more sanitary than the person enforcing the rules. the enforcer. why do these people exist? what do they get out of keeping the building dog-free?

ok - now that i've said that...

i'm moving again. i love my housemates but i just need a bit more personal space, it turns out...

and they're being mean about it. i feel like i'm breaking up with someone. but it's a whole house. and i try to say "it's not you, it's me" but everyone has heard that so many times that they no longer believe it. "it's not you, it's me" translates into "i hate everything about you and your lifestyle and your mother's lifestyle. i'm saying it's not you, it's me, but in reality, it's ALL ABOUT YOU!!! and everything you stand for. and everything you are, have been, or ever will be. basically, i just think you suck."

so...that's where i'm at today.

hope you are all well out there!
xoxo terra =)